Dolce far Niente

Several years ago, a DNA test showed that I have some Italian ancestry! A good percentage in fact... ohhh I can just picture my husband's face rolling his eyes and making kind fun of me every time I mention the percentages for each nationality 😅 🤷🏻‍♀️

Well, this result did not quite blow my mind given the proximity and similarities with my native homeland Portugal. It did, however, explain the inner sensations, emotions and connection I feel towards all the cultures that came up in the test.

If I have in fact burried within me an ancestral connection to these places, it certainly explains my love for Spanish rhythms and Italian opera amongst others.

In Italy there is a saying I absolutely adore and resonate with... Dolce far niente 💙

The sweetness of doing nothing!

The essence behind this is to pause and appreciate the stillness. Just like a beautiful painting or sculpture, this too is an art... to find contentment and fullfilment in quietness. 

It could easily be used to describe the Winter, a season to pause and reflect... to appreciate the beareness of nature, the warm sensation of a fire place and the softness of a cosy hat and gloves.

It is the time for being rather than doing.

And I really feel this! If feels like it runs through my veins.

I have been making pauses to contemplate nature and allowing myself to be entertained by the birds and squirrels, so much so that I can easily get lost in time. This sure tastes like sweet nectar to my soul!

The oposite end to this is the world around me at the moment... the January rush and everyone talking/posting about new year's resolutions... what to do...how to do it...what to buy in order to be successful and stick to the goals... it makes me tired just listing it all 🥱 this low energy really depletes my batteries 😳

The problem with resolutions is that they are often unrealistic... a romantic idea of what one needs to do in order to achieve perfection! And usually starts from a place of guilt and dissatisfaction and ends up in disappoitment 🤷🏻‍♀️

Is it a coincidence then, that there are so many people around feeling misserable, frustrated and deflated after all the festivities?

I find myself wondering why are we creatures of extremes? 

Do the 'all or nothing' ; 'go big or go home' ; 'no pain no gain' ; 'in for a penny - in for a pound' approaches actually serve us in a positive way? What if 'less is more' ; 'work smarter nor harder' were more helpful?

I am certainly not advocating one should not have visions or goals in life, oh no!!! It is having those that keep me on the life path... my personal 'dangling carrots' as I like to call them 🥕

But I like to keep these light and flexible by not having a tight grip on things and adapt them to where I find myself at any given day.

I just feel that any journey we set up for ourselves needs to come from a place of love and self care, not punishment or guilt.

We need to ask ourselves questions such as :

Does over indulging during the festive period (or any time of the year for that matter) make me feel good? This can be food, drink, shopping, anything really!

If not, why do I do it?

Am I trying to fill an empty hole within my heart? 

Can I find my Midle Road and more equilibrium for next time?

What help and resources do I need to draw my own life map?

Can we learn to make pauses and create our personal Dolce far niente sweet moments?

(Anyone up for a break to enjoy a cup of tea and a slice of chocolate panettone 🤭)

When you find yourselves at a crossroads, staring at the direction signs, which path will you take?

Personally, at this time of the year, I will follow the slow road leading to nature's invite to focus on self-care and renewal... fancy joining me?

Sara 💙

'It is only when there is no goal and no rush that the human senses are fully open to receive the world'

Alan Watts